‘Fever’? you ask? It’s been one fiercely frigid month after all. Snow storms every few days, ice, some hail, rain leading to more ice, powerful winds. It has been a very busy couple of weeks with more of the same expected this week. It’s become rather tiresome as most outdoor activity has been unpleasant if not impossible. We need options to warm up our spirits. Fear not. I have a few suggestions.
Last Friday, I went to the member’s preview of the Orchid Show at the New York Botanical Gardens. This might well be my favorite one thus far. While it’s always fun to see a mad array of colorful flowers in the middle of winter, I’ve never found myself as motivated and inspired as I was by this one. Taking its cue from the designs of Mexican modernist architect Luis Barragán, the show transports you to Mexico where you feel the warmth, the vibrant colors and rhythmic music lift your mood. The orchids are arranged and grouped brilliantly – coordinated and curated colors that sing in harmony. Juxtaposed with walls in vivid hues, sculptural cacti and traditional pots, it is tasteful and artful. Indeed cacti and orchids require different conditions to thrive but there are design lessons to be learned nevertheless. I love this show and plan to visit it again soon. Do go see for yourself. At the very least, it’ll serve as a welcoming, warm respite.
The Garden Conservancy’s Open Days directory arrived over the weekend. Thumbing through it is jolly exciting – so many interesting and beautiful gardens to visit. I know I won’t have the time to visit them all but it’s gloriously fun to consider the possibility. The final list will be shorter of course. Now is the time to make plans, schedule them into the calendar and make reservations in a timely manner. It’s the best way to ensure I get to see new gardens and revisit old favorites all of which will no doubt keep me enthused all through the gardening season. February affords one the time to peruse and plan at leisure. Take full advantage. Note: My garden has it’s Open Day on May 10. Come on over!
Finally, starting this coming Sunday, February 23, there’s a new show on NBC. The Grosse Point Garden Society is described as an “American drama television series set in a wealthy suburb where everything appears to be perfect on the surface. Four members of the local garden club get entangled in a scandalous murder… with mysteries, drama and deceit growing like weeds …!”. I learned of it quite by chance – it caught my attention right away! Since I adore both gardening and murder mysteries, I’m eager to check it out. If anything, it’ll be fun to see how hoticulturally accurate or inaccurate it will be!
I firmly believe that over the years, both garden and gardener need to evolve. We must keep up with the time as new horticultural introductions come to light, the latest scientific understanding shows us how to adjust or alter the way we garden, climate change forces us to adapt to different conditions, our age insists we seek to downsize, get some extra pair of hands or simplify our gardens. Our aesthetics and preferred styles evolve. We lose plants to weather related crises, pests or owns own negligence. The point is, it is up to us to determine how well we ourselves grow and consequently, how our gardens do so as well. With the right attitude, it is an exciting process. After all, maintaining a status quo is not only humdrum and tedious but can be detrimental. Without actively making positive change, taking a chance on trying something new, welcoming opportunities and enjoying the progress that is made, one is in peril of letting the world pass us and our gardens by.
For me, February is the ideal time to think about ways I can tweak my garden to make it more interesting and/or exciting. Sometimes the tweak can be substantial as was when I decided to create the vertical garden or something much smaller as in the case of having a ‘display’ by the curb to give passers by something to lift their mood as they drive or walk by. In any event, I derive enormous pleasure from it all and inevitably learn so much as well.
This year, I’m dreaming of creating a proper collection of citrus plants. Mostly varieties of lemons with some types of oranges in the mix. Nothing too ambitious as there is much to understand. For some years now, I’ve been successfully growing calamondin oranges, Meyer lemons and regular lemons. They all live in pots that go into the greenhouse each winter. In addition, after seeing the hardy orange (suitable for my neck of the northeast) at the NYBG, I acquired 3 very young trees of the same from Hortus Gardens. One day, when they’ve reached a reasonable size, I will have to find them a suitable site in my tiny garden. They’re slow growers so that time is a few years away. But already in my mind’s eye I can see this trio looking mighty fine in their fullness.
My source of inspiration and motivation is a book I’m currently reading. ‘The Land Where Lemons Grow’ is one that must be read slowly in order to fully appreciate the history of citrus cultivation in Italy. I’m picking up several nuggets of wisdom and simultaneously escaping from the harsh winter here to the romance of Italy. I’m savoring this book as one does a fine glass of chilled limoncello.
Soon I will research and source types of citrus I’d like to grow. Consider my budget before placing orders, acquire appropriately lovely pots and then, launch into squeezing a ‘lemon house’ in my already crowded piece of paradise. That last one could be a pipe dream but why should that stop me from dreaming anyway?
My juices are definitely flowing.
Note: All fruit (except the 3 showing the NYBG hardy orange and label towards the end) in the following images were homegrown!
The inspiration!My watercolorthe hardy orange at the NYBGMy next read
It’s a quiet time in my garden – under a thick blanket of snow everyone is asleep. I’m almost envious because my own mind is filled with all sorts of things, many of which are keeping me restless if not awake at night. Amongst my garden dreams of how I want this upcoming growing season to unfold, what new coveted plants to introduce to the current residents when they awaken, schedule the myriad chores, get tools, supplies and seeds ready, other projects to plan and prepare for like art shows and the annual Lyndhurst Flower Show in April (I’m ‘doing’ the Servants Dining Room this year!), a big house project (still in the envisioning stage), all of which are exciting, it is the news both national and international that has me worried, angry, frustrated and saddened. It is extremely overwhelming to say the least. I suspect I’m not alone in feeling this way.
I’ll admit that some days have been rough, others more normal and a few where I’ve been blissfully transported to a world of joy and laughter. Clearly, I need more of the last kind. On examining the different sort of days and how I specifically felt, I came to some obvious facts. The rough days were when I read or watched too much news. Subconsciously all the information found its way to my muscles and tensed them, it saturated my thoughts so I was unable to focus on what I wanted to do or create. Without that creative work, I became irritable, agitated and absolutely no fun to be around with. At the end of such a day I was left quite annoyed with myself and also exhausted. And sleep was elusive.
The normal days were the ones where I followed my to-do list for the day. Purposefully attending to each item – working out, reading, creating by way of painting, designing, writing or developing a project, getting in a walk to catch some sun and enjoy nature, catching up with the news at days end, some kind of movie or show and keeping regular sleep hours.
The best days were those where I completely tuned off the news and instead, I connected with people. Creative as well as mundane but necessary work still got done. Workouts and walks happened. Reading was given due time. But, instead of scrolling on Instagram or checking my news feed, I chatted with friends who lived far away and caught up with what they’d been up to and shared my own doings. Unfailingly, such conversations left me uplifted and motivated to get on with my own work on hand, Often, I scheduled a walk with a friend and we discussed what we were reading, planned on reading, shows we’d watched, goings on in our town, our families and our work, brainstormed ideas if either one of us needed it – stuff only friends can help with. Or, I met up with a group to try out a new restaurant for dinner or see a movie at an actual theater and then discuss it over drinks.
One of my most favorite things is game night – playing Charades, board games or anything else that involves getting silly and/or friendly competition invariably generates lots of laughter and camaraderie. It’s often cross-generational. For the full duration of such an evening, all the gravitas of the world is forgotten. The spirits are buoyed so much that the good effects last well beyond that single night.
Now, I might wear several hats but I am ultimately a gardener at heart. So in winter when my garden is in repose, I still crave to be amidst plants. A bit of time spent in the greenhouse is lovely but space is at a premium in there – one cannot hang out beyond an hour. The temperature that feels cozy when one steps in from outside quickly reminds me that the it is set at a number that keeps the plants alive but not conducive for humans lolling about.
I fix this need by indulging in some floral therapy. I buy myself orchids, fresh flowers and pots of hyacinths and other bulbs. Often the bulbs are ones I’ve had cooling for many weeks and are ready for forcing. But, I’m also a sucker for those temptations at the grocery store – right about now there are pots and pots of tulips, daffodils, hyacinths and such waiting for me to show up. I cannot express how happy it makes me to have them at various locations in my home. The hyacinths send their perfume out simply to seduce me – I will give them company and close attention till I suddenly become aware of what I should be doing instead. Like finishing this article or a garden design for a client, making progress on a painting or getting dinner going. What a wonderful distraction!
Between engaging with community and plants, the most enjoyable days are to be had. Less Facebook (maybe none) and more face-to-face time. Less gossip, more games. By no means should we ignore the news but, lets partake of it judiciously. Then, do something about it – communicate thoughts and requests to our senators and representatives in Congress, sign-up to volunteer/support/donate as needed. Lets use our voices, our skills, our positions to make a difference to effect the change we’d like. Lend a hand to the vulnerable and be a force in our respective communities. This is empowering to ourselves as well as each other. Sitting around whining and complaining will achieve nothing. Instead, in the words of the late, great John Lewis, “lets make good trouble”. Get involved. Be useful.
So, take frequent deep breaths and be fully engaged. We are all community and stronger together. And be sure to sniff a flower or two.
It’s become a frequent topic of conversation these days and one often fraught with defensive/aggressive/heated words but, even worse indifference. That last noun to me is one I find unacceptable simply because it implies a total lack of personal responsibility. I’m talking about the matter of dealing with autumn’s fallen leaves. For years, it was considered de rigeur to rake, collect and bag the leaves. It symbolized tidy, cared-for properties of which the owners took immense pride.
Then, composting became a thing and everyone was encouraged to put all the collected leaves into their compost heap which of course assumes one had such a feature. In some cases, towns had begun collecting the bagged (large brown paper sacks) leaves and composting the lot to eventually offer free compost to its residents. At first, building or buying a personal compost bin was also met with resistance. Would it smell (no), attract critters like raccoons and skunks (also no). A proper composter composed of the correct ratio of green and brown organic waste from both kitchen and garden should not have any strong or bad odor. Nor are creatures drawn to it because that sort of material is available in plenty in nature. It’s the stuff we put out in our garbage cans they’re after.
Occasionally, animals such as opossums and mice that already live in the area, might get into the lower depths of the heap because they seek warmth – as the bio-materials break down, heat is generated which makes for cozy quarters in the depth of winter. By the time springs rolls around, they’ve usually left. No harm done.
In any case, folks eventually came around to seeing the value of composting. Some started it in their own properties and others happily handed them over to the town. But everyone learned the benefits of composting – using the mature compost to enrich their soils and appreciating how well it performed as a mulch to suppress weeds and hold in moisture.
Fun fact –when I started on my garden 30 years ago, I decided I would apply only organic methods and also set up both a rain barrel and composter. The latter being exclusively for kitchen scraps while the larger quantity of garden waste was relegated to the woods. For this, I was called “quaint and old fashioned”. Now, I’m simply a gardener ahead of her time which is laughable considering how very ancient those practices are. I’ll happily take old fashioned and quaint. Only in the realm of gardening mind you. Just to be clear!
Currently, the discussion of how to handle those fallen leaves has shifted somewhat. While the leaves are still good to compost, letting them remain where they have fallen is encouraged. It makes senses that the leaves will provide hideaways for small creatures through the winter and eventually degrade into the soil putting back nutrients for next years demands. What type of creatures you ask? Bumblebees, some moths and butterflies, their eggs, caterpillars, pupae, beetles, woodlice and more which are integral to the food webs. When we remove the leaves, we are disposing off them too.
The general problem many have with this is that it makes the garden look messy. Neglected. It is a matter of aesthetics. Which as we know changes all the time. If everyone left the leaves alone, then the same ‘messy’ look wouldn’t stick out. As it stands now, the variations in a neighborhood actually point out the gardeners who think caring for the environment is more important to them..By no means does that mean the rest do not care but, its the optics that make some folk pass judgment. There are a few ‘tricks’ to letting folk know you aren’t a lazy, negligent or unconcerned gardener – for instance, keep the front edge of the plant beds clean with an application of a layer of (preferably homegrown!) compost and let the fallen leaves cover the rest of bed beyond. Or, edge the beds with attractive material like bricks or prettily patterned metal edgers. Juxtapose messy with tidy.
The other valid concern is about how a thick mat of leaves can easily smother a lawn. (I’m happy to revisit the whole lawn situation at another time and I will). If this is something that is indeed a problem, by all means remove those leaves but, distribute them around plants in the beds and borders. Compost any excess that remains. At the same time, I gently nudge you to reflect on whether you really need as much lawn.
There is no disagreement that as the leaf litter degrades, it becomes humus which is a highly rich layer, but also, in removing the leaves, we are depriving the garden of what is considered an ecologically prized zone, one that is an invaluable habitat for the critters that gardeners need to help out the plants they grow. In nature, when trees and other plants shed their foliage, it’s not to merely dispose of them. They are setting up their own cyclical system of supplying themselves with the nutrients as well as the useful creatures they will require in the following growing season. So when we, in our gardens go about gathering up all the leaves, we are depriving the plants of their natural food, Think about all the fertilizer that is applied annually – unnecessary, costly and unhealthy when it gets into the water table or as run-off into bodies of water nearby.
In my own garden, I let the fallen leaves remain in place except over the tiny front lawn (if one can call it that) that does get smothered easily as well as the path through the meadow that leads to the woods beyond. The leaves from these areas get blown onto the beds/areas close by. Far less work than raking and gathering!
It really isn’t an all or nothing situation. First and foremost, as gardeners, we are on the same side so lets not fight. Together, we garden to create beauty and care responsibly for the piece of Earth of which we are so very privileged to be custodians. That is our covenant.
In the final analysis, we want to leave behind a better world. Surely, we can all agree on that.
Leaves left in the meadowPlants push through the leaves in springMetal edgers
I had planned on writing about something specific to gardening but my mind and heart have been filled with what’s happening in LA. It’s nothing short of devastating. When all is lost it is hard to see even a sliver of light at the end of what seems to be a very long, dark tunnel. For now, while we witness this reality unfolding, I submit to you 2 poems that I hope will give some food for thought and then some hopeful comfort. Most importantly and urgently, each of us must do whatever we can to help and assist those impacted.
Climate Change
Kangaroo floods leap across miles
Yankee storms hit with power
Aztec earthquakes sacrifice young lives
Norse volcanoes conjure blinding smoke.
Pacific winds fan relentless fires
Sumatran tsunamis wash countless souls
Bantu droughts parch migrating throats
Peking skies mark mankind’s limit
Polar icebergs diminish penguin turf.
Climate change at full throttle.
– Shobha Vanchiswar
Dark And Light
The light of day
sparkles honest
Cobwebs shimmer
rewards promised
Hope soars
confidence shines
Courage accompanies
mountains to climb
Sunrises occasion
plans anew
Clarity surfaces
Beliefs ring true
Nightfall arrives
slow and sure
Shadows lurk
luring fear
Darkness imposes
time to remember
Review, regret
call to surrender
Sunsets precede
hidden dreads
Anxiety reigns
awake in bed
Reality lies
in plain sight
There’s nothing in the dark
that’s not in the light.
-Shobha Vanchiswar
Some of my watercolors depicting snowscapes – a sense of serenity that we could all use right now. –
By now, I hope you’ve had time to read my article from last week and found some motivation in the to-do list. As I’d indicated, I plan on sharing my thoughts on how we collectively can do better for our gardens and by extension the world at large.
I’m tackling #3 from that list which reminds one to keep bird feeders well supplied. Now, I firmly believe that if one lives in an area already rich in natural food supplies for the birds, then that is the best situation for them. Well planted gardens will not see a shortage of plumed visitors. Bird feeders are artificial food sources. More often than not, they are put up so we humans can enjoy observing the avian antics. If one were totally honest, a certain self-righteousness also comes into the picture – how kind and thoughtful we are by providing for them.
If the birds do not have adequate natural food sources, it’s because we, humans, have removed/changed their habitats to accommodate our needs for homes, industry, recreation and such. So, it is incumbent upon us to first provide for them by way of what we plant in our gardens, what sort of gardening practices we employ and by way of sound city/town planning, recreating green spaces such as woodlands, meadows and parks. Then, and only then should we consider bird feeders to augment their food supply. We mean well but birds are wild creatures and must be allowed to remain so. Otherwise, maintaining the delicate balance of a healthy environment will be untenable.
Having feeders in winter is about giving the non-migrating birds some food security. A helping hand of sorts. Keep in mind that the typical blend of seeds is meant to serve a mix of bird species. In nature however, different types of birds do not mingle or feed together. So, feeders create competition and/or aggressive behavior that is not seen in the wild. Therefore, understand that observations made by watching feeding birds is not of their typical behavior.
I have deep reservations regarding feeders put up at other times of year. We want to have our gardens and green spaces to fulfill the needs of the birds. They need to forage the way Nature intended for them. Additionally, in spring and summer when most birds are feeding their young, bird seeds do not provide the high amount of protein those baby birds require to grow healthy and strong. Insects and worms do that. Data shows that when feeders are around, the parent birds go the easy route because foraging is very hard work! We really aren’t doing them any favors by altering their natural habits. Gives pause for thought I hope.
If (winter) feeders are put up, then, they must be kept replenished continuously. If one is going away on vacation or for the holidays, then it is crucial to make suitable arrangements to keep the feeders in service. We cannot have dependent birds suddenly do without can we?
All of this is to say that if we are to feed our birds, we must always have their best interests at heart. Planting a diverse array of native plants, shrubs and trees should be our highest priority. Applying organic practices is non-negotiable. Like the well known saying “Give a man a fish, he eats for one day. But teach him how to fish and he eats for life”, lets be mindful, intentional and deliberate about how and why we support our birds. The fact is that humans need and depend on their service in pollinating, seed dispersal and pest control. In an ideal world, the birds do not need us. At all.
Full disclosure – Due to my own schedule of winter travel, I no longer put up feeders. The only feeders I put up are for hummingbirds because these tiny creatures need copious amounts of nectar not always in adequate supply if the climate affects the bloom time of flower or the heat causes flowers to die too soon. Of course, aforesaid feeders are installed when the diminutive ones return in mid to late spring until they depart in late summer/early fall.
Note: where you put up feeders matters. I once had an infestation of rats attracted by all the spilled seeds (birds are messy eaters). As a result, the rodents decided to check out my warm home very close by. I still shudder thinking of that experience.
A new year brings new hopes and plans. For many it is a fresh start – an opportunity to do over, make change or turn a new leaf. I’ve never been one to make resolutions per se but have instead aimed to do better. To work on improving myself wherever I’ve fallen short of my own expectations. Over the years I’ve learned it’s important to get more specific about it.
For instance, I love books and used to be a voracious reader. However, in recent years the time devoted to reading had diminished to the point that it really bothered me. And every year I’d say I’d read more – a couple of books or more every month. As easy as that seemed, I’m embarrassed to admit that with everything else taking up my time, I was lucky if it was a book a month. Until I hit upon the solution most suited for me. Instead of thinking reading was to be done when I had free time or at the end of the day, I now read first thing in the morning. For at least 30 minutes I indulge my love of reading – guilt free. Then, whenever some time frees up, I might read some more. This is usually more serious/non-fiction reading. At night, I read a few pages of something lighter before sleep takes over. As a result, I’m reading more and feeling so much better about myself. Simple personalized tweaking.
Similarly, in the garden, there are many chores that get done regularly but almost without attention or mindfulness. It’s great to tick off items on the to-do list but all too often they don’t get done as well as they ought nor with the application of better, more current information and sensibilities. We can do so much better. And that’s what I hope to bring to attention from here on. While a general list of what needs doing each month will be presented, we will consider what and how we can improve on some things. I hope you too will share your thoughts and ideas. #bettertogether !
And that’s what I’ve resolved. Who’s on board?
What to do in January –
Survey the garden after every storm or snowfall. If any damage such as broken branches or torn off protection has occurred, try to fix it as soon as possible. Likewise, large icicles hanging from roof edges pose a threat to plants below: shield the plants if the icicles cannot be removed.
Take down holiday decorations. Before disposing off the Christmas tree, cut branches to spread as mulch on flower beds.
Keep bird feeders full. Whenever possible, have water available for the birds.
Inspect stored tubers, corms and bulbs for signs of mold and rot. Get rid of any that don’t look healthy.
This is a good time to examine the ‘bones’ of the garden. Make notes of what needs developing, changing or improving.
Make icy paths safe by sprinkling sand or grit. Avoid toxic de-icing products.
If ground is wet/soggy, take care to protect the sodden areas by not walking on it too much. Better yet, protect it by putting down a temporary path of wood planks.
Take an inventory of garden tools. Get them repaired, replaced or sharpened.
Gather up seed and plant catalogs. Start planning for the coming season.
Begin forcing the bulbs kept cool since late fall. Time to start an indoor spring!
Keep an eye on indoor plants ( in the house or greenhouse). Inspect carefully for signs of pests or disease. Act right away if either is detected. Organic practices only please.
Still on indoor plants: water as needed, rotate for uniform light exposure, fertilize every two to four weeks. Remove dead or yellowing leaves.
Enjoy the respite offered by this cold month. Busy season will be here soon enough.
Wishing everyone a happy, healthy, productive 2025
With the garden asleep I hope you enjoy the sampling of my black and white watercolors of flowers –
It’s that time of year when I look through the rear view mirror of the year and do a performance review of sorts. Based on that, I look ahead to the new year and accordingly make plans. In the interest of this blog, I shall focus on the garden.
The underlying factor that unquestionably impacted the garden in 2024 was the unpredictable weather. From a very mild winter that coughed up a single snowfall to an early spring that oscillated between cold and wet to mild and dry to a summer that got way too hot and had too much rain to a fall that was long, mild and very dry. We’ve been so dry that we’re under a burn ban of all categories as well as a water restriction warning till Dec 31. Naturally, it followed that leafing out, flowering and fruiting times of many plants were hastened or delayed. I can only imagine how much these uncertain conditions affected all other life forms that coexist with the plants. While most gardeners took it in stride, the writing is on the wall or more appropriately in this case, on the earth. Climate change is well underway.
In order to come to terms with it and be a responsible gardener, I’m giving the matter a great deal of thought and doing a fair amount of research. It can no longer be gardening as usual. New understanding, new attitudes and new ways are in order. Gardens and gardeners must change together with the climate. That is a tall order because change is not easy especially when it requires a lot to happen in a short amount of time. And time, for many things, is no longer unlimited. We must act now even as we adjust and adapt by the seat of our pants. There’s no how-to manual for the situation we’re in. However, gardeners are resilient, resourceful and always ready to learn and do what it takes to serve their piece of Paradise well.
So, come 2025, I intend to share my findings, thoughts and plans on how I intend to garden in this climate challenged world. I hope you too will give the matter your due consideration and communicate back to me. We are stronger together and together we can do our part to nurture our gardens and the world at large. That will be our legacy to the future.
I will not post next week. I will see you in the New Year!
Happy, healthy holidays to all!
Note: Scenes from my home and garden right now –
I am so proud of this wreath! Made entirely from materials from my garden, it is 3 feet in diameter and celebrates itself loud and proud!!Abutilon blooming in the greenhouseAmaryllis at homeGrowth from past spring’s bulbs had started emerging in early November. Will they bloom next spring? Fingers crossed.Beauty in senescence.
2024 feels like it’s been a long year does it not? Then why am I surprised that we’re already in December? It must be because Thanksgiving was so late that we’ve had no transition time to make our way over to the holiday frenzy. Well, never mind. We are here and we’re going to make the most of it.
The part I like best about decorating for the season is using the bounty from the garden. From late summer on, I save interesting leaves, branches, seed pods and anything else that catches my fancy from prunings and such. This year, a giant wreath of preserved magnolia leaves was created and it has been waiting to be commissioned since October. I shall insert in the preserved leaves of the oak-leaf hydrangea, okra and agapanthus seed pods, some allium heads I’d gilded last year and await everyone’s cries of approval. Otherwise, there will be coal in their stockings.
The many amaryllis I started a few weeks ago will begin to bloom in a week or so and matters should look festive for some good fa la la fun.
But first, there’s still the odd garden chore(s) to tend. So, here is the December to-do list:
1. Hurry up and finish any pending plant protecting tasks! Ditto for statuary and other articles left outdoors.
2. Complete mulching all plants.
3. Drain out all outdoor water pipes. Store hoses properly.
4. Keep bird feeders filled.
5. Keep on top of watering plants in greenhouse and house. Stay vigilant for signs of pests or disease.
6. Set aside seed and plant catalogs for making plans for next year’s growing seasons.
7. Archive garden photos taken through this year. They will come in handy when you design for next year.
8. Enjoy paperwhites and amaryllis bulbs blooming indoors.
9. Make use of this down time and relax! Don’t let the Holiday Season wear you down.
Cheers.
Note: Since I haven’t as yet got any decorations actually installed, here are some trees from years past from my home and elsewhere:
Thanksgiving is exactly what we need right now. As the holiday that quietly reaffirms us as one nation coming together to count our blessings and give thanks as we break bread with family and friends, we are particularly primed for it this year. As much as such gatherings are invariably fraught with old grudges and grievances, it is, if we are honest, about reconnecting and recognizing the bonds that hold us together.
This week, I know too many people who are going to their usual Thanksgiving gatherings with a greater than usual degree of trepidation. And I’ve been giving this matter a lot of thought. How can we change this narrative? Naturally, I turned to the wisdom imparted from the garden.
To start, we must accept that we are each responsible for the situation we are in. That is the plain truth. Acknowledge it. It is no different from when we confront a big problem in the garden. Take for instance the fall of a mighty tree that causes some significant and costly damage. Our first instinct is to blame it on the storm that felled the tree down. But the storm didn’t arrive specifically to cause that damage. It has no hidden reason. If we can concede that, then, we must look deeper and find the true cause(s).
So, first, lets consider individual responsibility. If I was the gardener I’d have to ask myself if I had done right by the tree. Was it in the right location? Was the tree suitable to the area and hence accordingly hardy? Had it been pruned and/or braced appropriately? Was it fed and watered regularly? Had I done due diligence in monitoring its health? What had I, if at all, neglected to do? It’s only in clearing my conscience fully can I then look elsewhere to ascertain the cause.
Collective responsibility – did we as gardeners/residents in the neighborhood ignore signs that should’ve raised a few red flags? Or, worse, did any of us choose to keep silent about something we observed “because it was not our business?” “ Not our problem!”? Not speaking up, failing to share information, conveying said information with clarity, lending a helping hand are all matters that concern everybody.
If individually or collectively we are fully absolved of any or all dereliction of duty, then and only then might we say it was singularly the storm that made the tree fall. You see my point? At this time, I’m not going to get started on the human factor in the changing climate resulting in more fierce and frequent storms happening everywhere!
I think I’ve made my case. We are all, directly or indirectly connected and part of a greater whole. We need to focus on how to be better. Do better. If only to keep coming together for Thanksgiving and celebrating this one life we each have been given.
So this year, make that decision to arrive at the holiday table with a resolve to set aside grievances. Avoid all conversation/debate about the elephant in the room if you can! Seriously. Let that matter be until each person has made peace with him/herself. For now, unclench your fist to offer an open hand. Declare a tentative truce. Instead, concentrate on the ties that make you family, shared histories and genes, common interests, play some games that everyone can enjoy ( Charades is my go to). Just maybe, it’ll be a whole lot more fun than you could’ve imagined.
Lets not give up before we even try.
For now, lets clear up the debris, review the state of the damage in the garden and make firm efforts to repair, replace, restore. In time, a new tree will be planted and we shall grow it to be mighty.
From the bottom of my heart I wish you a very happy Thanksgiving.
Enjoy the beauty and majesty of some trees that captivated me this year :